Empowering Adventure: A Travel Writer’s Journey to Foster Independence in Her Son

• I am a mother and travel author; my family frequently journeys with me.
• I have been working to foster my son’s independence while we explore since he was little.
• He manages his own luggage, assists us in planning our trips, and saves money for souvenirs prior to our departures.

Before our recent international trip, my 7-year-old wandered around our house with his carry-on backpack, testing its weight to ensure it was manageable for our lengthy flight. He maneuvered through the airports remarkably. Of course, he required assistance at certain points, but witnessing him take initiative in genuine situations is profoundly gratifying.

One of my aspirations as a mother is to instill independence in my son, particularly during our travels. It’s not always straightforward — at times it’s faster to handle things myself — but how will he learn if I don’t allow him the opportunity?

Here are several strategies we’ve implemented to promote independence during our family journeys.

He organizes his own carry-on backpack and suitcase

Children require various items to keep entertained. Our son organizes his carry-on with our guidance, typically including a stuffed toy, activity books, video games, and an abundance of snacks. This approach ensures he is aware of his play items and available treats, reducing questions like, “What can I do?” or “What can I eat?” significantly.

He also organizes his suitcase. We inform him of the weather and the duration of our absence, allowing him to select outfits accordingly. He places each complete outfit on his bed. Then, based on our destination, he adds a collection of extras. These might include bathing suits and goggles as well as beanies and jackets.

He carries his own items

Encouraging him to manage his own belongings during our travels is essential. We’ve motivated our little one to carry his own backpack since he was just a year old. Although his initial bag resembled a rocket ship and was quite small, this practice fostered greater independence (for him) and left me with a free hand.

He takes pleasure in the responsibility of overseeing all his cherished items — at least most of the time. Recently, during a layover in Heathrow, my weary child required some assistance, and I was glad to help.

We educate him about financial independence

A few weeks — or even months — prior to a significant trip, I create a chore list, which includes tasks such as raking leaves, washing cars, folding laundry, and dusting surfaces. This list is placed on the refrigerator, with a small amount of money assigned to each chore. As my son completes a task, I check it off the list.

Before we depart for vacation, we calculate the total amount of money he has earned from completing chores. This total represents his budget for spending on our trip. He places it in a wallet, which my husband and I supervise. When we visit souvenir shops and toy stores, we discuss his remaining balance, allowing him to select his travel mementos accordingly.

He assists in planning family trips

Our small family of three discusses our upcoming travel plans and what we desire to accomplish while there. We continue to refine our itinerary throughout our journeys. My son has a say. If there are attractions he wishes to visit — such as a castle, swimming pool, or toy store — we attentively consider his input and incorporate it into our discussions.

Participating in planning cultivates decision-making and negotiation abilities. Since we often face too many activities and too few vacation days, our conversations naturally address time management. By valuing our son’s opinions and acknowledging his interests, we empower him with confidence in his choices.

We exemplify behavior when difficulties arise

My child observes my reactions during challenging situations. Regrettably, despite all the preparations, traveling is rife with unforeseen obstacles. However, these hurdles can provide remarkable educational opportunities for children.

To inspire my son to tackle problems effectively, I endeavor to set a good example by not dwelling on the negatives, but rather concentrating on finding a resolution. This, of course, is undoubtedly simpler in theory than in practice. I’ve lost my patience more times than I would prefer, particularly when I’m famished. Packing snacks for myself has proven to be beneficial as well.

Throughout the last seven years, my son’s backpacks have expanded in size, and his voice has become more assertive. It is my wish that his self-reliance continues to flourish as he matures into a self-assured and competent traveler.