Embracing the Spirit of Love and Gratitude this Christmas Season – Marin Independent Journal

Editor’s remark: The IJ is reissuing several of the late Beth Ashley’s columns. This one dates back to 2017.

A woman waiting in line at CVS confided that she was struggling to embrace the festive spirit of Christmas.

“The world is in too much chaos,” she remarked to me.

I concurred, feeling a weight in my heart.

Yet as I unloaded my basket at the register, it overflowed with wrapping paper, crimson ribbons, and supplies for our customary Christmas Eve gathering.

Somehow, we manage to persist.

My Christmas shopping list, as per usual, is alarmingly extensive — presents for four sons and their spouses, nine grandchildren, two great-grandchildren, and a multitude of nieces, nephews, and friends.

When I determine what someone desires or requires, I take delight in purchasing it. However, when I am merely fulfilling an obligation, I feel uneasy.

“Most of us possess more items than we can truly utilize,” expressed the woman at CVS.

As catalogs arrive, when radio stations incessantly play “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year,” and every retailer is adorned in red and green and silver (with Santa’s booming “ho-ho-ho” over the loudspeakers), I find myself wanting to forgo the entire season.

This year, much like the last, I have given some friends gifts from Heifer International, which funds geese, ducks, or other livestock for struggling families in developing nations. While not strictly a Christmas dissent, it serves to make my gift-giving feel more palatable.

This alleviates my conscience regarding my abundance.

I am aware we inhabit a world saturated with pleasures — increasingly delectable clothing, ever more exquisite food and wine, and astonishing technological gadgets.

These are indicators of human advancement, a remarkable transition from primitive living to luxurious existence.

It would be unwise for me to dismiss such wonders, though at times I ponder where this progress might eventually conclude. How many additional luxuries do we truly require?

However, enter any store and the allure is evident: beautifully packaged gift items brimming with vibrant potential.

Thus, I visit the stores, and despite my mental reluctance, I make purchases.

A portion of my drive stems from the timeless desire — to bring joy to my dear ones through delightful surprises.

Another aspect comes from the urge to adhere to longstanding traditions. Regardless of being good or bad, our Christmas customs have always revolved around abundance — numerous gifts, ample food, numerous gatherings filled with chaos. The objective: to ensure that everyone feels secure, cherished, and loved.

A third motivation is to make a declaration — that despite the prevailing darkness in the world, we will ignite our own small flame of hope. We shall not succumb to despair.

It would be exceedingly easy, at this moment in time, to feel overwhelmed by the daily headlines: gun violence in the East Bay, relentless brutality in the Middle East, famine and civil unrest worldwide, abhorrent acts of murder occurring everywhere.

And yet, and yet.

Surrounding us are countless warm-hearted individuals, striving diligently to do good.

We have beleaguered friends who continue to persevere valiantly and children who, despite numerous temptations, have managed to turn out well.

There is much to be grateful for. Christmas was intended to be a season of hope, a time when all the world’s ugliness is miraculously redeemed.

Thus, we honor its purpose as best as we can, decorating the tree, wrapping presents, overlooking global calamities and rampant commercialism. We attend the festive gatherings. We embrace those we hold dear.

We strive to rationalize our good fortune while feeling guilty about the struggles of so many others.

We yield to the joyfulness. After all, we remind ourselves, it is indeed a wonderful life.

Christmas is a period I dread annually. Yet, deep down, it is a season I eventually come to cherish.

Originally Published: December 23, 2024 at 12:00 PM PST