You be the choose: ought to my boyfriend depart dwelling comforts behind after we journey overseas? | Life and magnificence

The prosecution: Jenna

Dave must embrace new experiences, as a substitute of at all times clinging on to what he is aware of

My companion, Dave, and I often dwell in London, however we’ve began to spend six months of the 12 months in Barcelona over the winter. I like the liberty it offers us, however we’ve totally different approaches in relation to preserving dwelling comforts after we’re overseas.

I consider Dave must acclimatise extra to Barcelona so as to get essentially the most out of it. When we obtained to our residence this 12 months, the furnishings was a bit drained. So Dave determined to repair that by shopping for a load of blankets. He draped them over every part. Dave mentioned he was masking up the worn-out furnishings, however the flat now appears much less like a Barcelona flat and extra like a British pupil bedsit. He thinks I’m simply being pedantic and calls me a snob.

I know we’ve totally different tastes, and there’s a sure attraction within the chaos, however his model of consolation simply appears an excessive amount of of a mishmash, and it appears as if he’s making an attempt too exhausting to recreate a way of our dwelling within the UK.

The blankets are actually an instance of an even bigger drawback, although. I feel Dave likes his dwelling comforts an excessive amount of and doesn’t do as a lot to embrace new issues. Whenever we journey, he’ll pack so many issues from Britain that I’ll begin to surprise: what’s the purpose in coming overseas? He will carry jerk seasoning, Marmite and Mini Cheddars. While I like all these issues, I don’t really feel we’d like them when we’ve moved to a rustic with higher produce on supply.

Bringing all these meals gadgets from dwelling limits our possibilities to strive new issues. I feel travelling and residing in new locations is all about placing your self outdoors your consolation zone, whereas Dave prefers to play it secure.

We’ve been collectively 9 years and he’s at all times been like this. I discover it fairly humorous, however I additionally don’t like him taking over packing area with teabags and crisps. Dave must department out and take a look at the native delicacies. The blankets he’s draped over our furnishings and the British meals he’s introduced have made me consider he must be extra open-minded.

We’re not in Barcelona to duplicate our lives in London. He must cease making an attempt to make our outdated tastes slot in right here.

The defence: Dave

We are overseas for six months a 12 months, so I prefer to take acquainted issues. Jenna’s simply being a snob

Jenna is a kind of well-travelled individuals who likes to inform everybody else learn how to get pleasure from their journeys. She can’t consider there are British cafes in Spain that serve a full English, and her mouth drops when she sees British folks consuming sausage and chips right here.

I jokingly name her a snob, however I see her level. You ought to embrace the native tradition once you journey. But folks ought to be capable to get pleasure from themselves nonetheless they like. Not everybody needs to spend their mornings deciphering a Catalan menu.

I prefer to really feel at dwelling after I’m away. I carry every part however the kitchen sink. I need my slippers, my favorite tea, my Mini Cheddars. Jenna, nonetheless, treats it like she’s a backpacker who should maintain every part mild.

It was her concept to do hybrid residing. We’re Irish however dwell in London, so we each have EU passports – we will simply sublet our flat and off we go. She says we aren’t organising a life overseas, simply residing away for six months, however six months is half the 12 months, not a weekend away. Sometimes she forgets to carry necessities like socks, an iPhone charger or a good jacket, and I’ve to strive not to say, “I told you so.”

When it involves adorning the flat, I take the lead as I’m the consumer out of us two. I purchased blankets so as to add heat and it’s my means of nesting. Jenna reacted as if I’d introduced dwelling a bunch of rags.

Our clashing types had been by no means a difficulty again dwelling, however right here she needs the tatty outdated furnishings to be seen to “let the Spanish vibe shine through”. What Spanish vibe? It’s all tatty stuff that doesn’t characterize Barcelona, however Jenna acts as if we’re going to offend the locals. I don’t care about impressing the vacationer police – it’s our dwelling.

I feel dwelling comforts are vital once you’re overseas. They make you are feeling grounded in your new area. I’m in all probability extra of a homebody than Jenna, however I’m up for travelling and residing overseas, too. Jenna says my behaviour is a bit bizarre and that I’m not being “present” in our new dwelling, however for me it’s about discovering a steadiness and merging the outdated and the brand new.

The jury of Guardian readers

Should Dave do extra to get into the Barcelona life-style?

A compromise may very well be to purchase the British gadgets within the native shops, to unlock packing area. Jenna looks like extra of a free spirit who’s glad to embrace the locals and the tradition. As Dave is agreeing to her needs, maybe she may settle for a few of his?
Mousumi, 53

As Dave and Jenna go to Barcelona for half the 12 months, I feel he ought to be capable to take some “home comforts” with him. It’s good that he sees Jenna’s level about embracing native tradition, so perhaps they might buy groceries collectively to purchase some Spanish furnishings.
Katharine 73

Jenna’s concept of Barcelona feels curated, nearly costume-like, however Dave actively rejects adapting. He’s turned residing overseas into merely exporting his on a regular basis habits, closing himself off to the tradition round him. Living in a foreign country is about increasing your horizons, not taking your acquainted comforts with you.
Daniel, 45

I discover myself lacking burger and chips after I’m away from the UK for some time, so I empathise with Dave. Jenna feels like she is being too strict about such issues. Why can’t he take his slippers away with him?
Janine, 39

It’s good to have creature comforts with you once you’re away. Reading between the traces, it feels like Dave doesn’t need to go away in any respect! So if he’s already compromising, Jenna ought to lower him some slack!
Anna, 24

Now you be the choose

In our on-line ballot, inform us: should Dave strive tougher to mix in?

The ballot closes on Wednesday 19 November at 9am GMT

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