Dear Excuse My Advice: My fiancé proposed however I hate the ring — can I give it again?

Gail Rudnick and Kim Murstein — the no-nonsense hosts of hit podcast sequence “Excuse My Grandma” — are The Post’s brand-new recommendation columnists.

From household feuds to friendship fallouts, cash, marriage and intercourse, there’s no subject too taboo to sort out, and the native New Yorkers will hash out every challenge from their differing views to inform the tough-love reality — and also you’ll thank them for it.

To get your questions answered, head to nypost.com/ema and drop them a be aware about what you want sorted.

Dear Excuse My Advice,

I’m a single dad elevating teenage daughters, and we’re both lacking feminine views I can’t absolutely present. What’s one of the best ways to help them with sturdy feminine position fashions?

Grandma Gail: Well, they’ve their grandmas. Or their aunts even, in the event that they don’t have grandmothers or don’t stay shut to close them. But possibly there’s a cousin or an aunt that’s within the neighborhood, or a household good friend household good friend who would possibly pull up that slack, as a result of ladies do have a tendency to want just a little assist with their hair, possibly methods to put their make-up on. You might FaceTime them.

Kim: What do you consider this? Could they’ve a feminine position mannequin within the media or one thing alongside these traces the place they will observe them on social, or learn their books, or no matter it’s to type of have that concept of like, okay, this particular person is objectives in my thoughts. I need to work in the direction of that.

Grandma Gail: But that’s very onerous as a result of there usually are not that many individuals that I’d counsel. I imply, until Oprah’s coming into the home. She can be the one position mannequin I might consider, of all people on TV. Or us! But the reality is, I feel a fingers on particular person, even when it’s not essentially the most good particular person, continues to be good.

Kim: I additionally assume for feminine position fashions it doesn’t essentially must be an elder. Like, typically you will discover that in a good friend, proper?

Grandma Gail: Yes, you’ll be able to.

Kim: Or you will discover it in a instructor or you will discover it in somebody in your spiritual group. So I feel placing them in a spot the place they’re round these type of individuals. You must have interactions and particularly from a distinct perspective.

Grandma Gail: I consider an important factor is nice, constructive households. And in case you’re lucky to have it, it doesn’t take a village since you’ve obtained your personal village. If you’re not in that place, it does assist in case you’ve obtained individuals round you and your loved ones who’re curious about your well-being. Also, for this father, there’s most likely nonetheless recommendation you’ll be able to take that your personal mom gave to you and move that onto your kids.

What do I however I feel your elders all the time have recommendation that’s price heeding. In each society it’s been a reverence for elders — and there was a motive for it. They’ve already gone by these experiences. It won’t be the identical actual expertise you’re going by, however they’ll have lived a life and can know what your kids want from theirs.

And so I feel that hopefully someplace in your neighborhood, you get some assist with that. There’s a wealth of data we will get from the older generations.

Kim: I agree. When we first began Excuse My Grandma, I knew — but it surely didn’t actually hit me instantly — that I might lean on you and your knowledge. But I’ve discovered a lot from the extra mature girls that I meet and have in my life. So I undoubtedly encourage you to try this on your ladies.

Dear Excuse My Advice,

My fiance proposed and I’m thrilled to marry him. But I hate the ring. Do I say one thing, or is that this a kind of belongings you’re supposed to simply settle for?

Grandma Gail: Are you kidding me? Just be quiet and settle for the ring and say “Thank you, it’s beautiful.” This complete factor is just like the weddings, the bachelor events, the vacation spot weddings, the ring. That’s not what marriage is about. You know the proposal is coming anyway. And most individuals do say, you understand, in case you’re going to choose one thing out for me, I really like the spherical or I really like a pear. Maybe simply throw it on the market.

Don’t preserve repeating till it’s annoying, however counsel it. But as soon as it’s in your in your hand, it’s yours and say it’s lovely. My husband didn’t ask me. He obtained what I assume his mom advised him to get.

Kim: Yes. Few ideas although. If you’re any individual who cares — like this particular person — about what form ring you get, it’s important to say one thing earlier than. And because the particular person proposing, if you understand your fiance is somebody who will care, it is best to most likely ask.

Grandma Gail: Sometimes the fellows don’t give it some thought, give them a break. They’re overwhelmed as a result of it’s so costly, and it’s one thing that they assume is fantastic. But I’d hope that he says, “Do you have a preference?” I feel most most males try this.

Kim: Your first ring doesn’t must be your solely ring. It’s not one thing you’re tattooing onto your physique.

Grandma Gail: Except the primary ring is essentially the most emotional.

Kim: But after it’s already in your finger, there’s completely no means you’ll be able to then be like, really, are you able to trade it?

Grandma Gail: No, that might be that might be actually hurtful, actually horrible. You simply have to just accept it. Right. And you will get a marriage band once you really get married that you simply like higher, as a result of that’s what you’re going to be sporting.

In in the present day’s world, only a few individuals stroll round with their solitaires as a result of they’ll get hit within the head for sporting that. You know, it’s for particular events. If you’re going to a celebration, most individuals simply put on a band. So no matter it’s, you understand what? Don’t fear about it.

Kim: If I obtained an unsightly ring…

Grandma Gail: You’d simply must preserve it, after which put on it round your neck.