South Carolina couple with 34-year age hole reveals ‘strict’ relationship guidelines in viral video

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A South Carolina couple with a 34-year age hole has shared their “relationship non-negotiables,” sparking controversy, with some saying they’re too “strict” and questioning whether or not a relationship with such a spot can final.

“I’m 26, and I’m 60, and these are non-negotiables in our age-gap relationship,” Gracen Greagen, 26, and her husband, Kevin Greagan, 60, start their viral video, sitting on deck chairs of their lake home in Greenville, SC.

Their first non-negotiable is that they pray collectively every day.


A couple with a 34-year age gap sitting together, holding hands, with text overhead reading "RELATIONSHIP NONNEGOTIABLES AS AN AGE GAP COUPLE."
A South Carolina couple with a 34-year age hole has gone viral after sharing their relationship “non-negotiables.” @gracenfaithg/TikTok

“Something we’ve implemented in our marriage is that we pray together every single night … It’s the last thing we do,” they mentioned.

“Regardless of your faith, the intentionality that goes into expressing gratitude … it’s a great way to center ourselves together and individually.”

Their second rule is that they don’t drink until they’re with one another.

“There’s a vulnerability in drinking and being intoxicated, and that’s not something I wanna be without my partner present,” the 60-year-old mentioned.

He added, “This was a decision we each made individually. We didn’t impose it on one another … Rather than looking at [it] as limiting or controlling, we look at it as uniquely special and uniquely committed to one another.”

He additionally famous, “You can’t have two or three or four or five drinks unless you have one drink. And I just choose not to do that when I’m out alone.”

Rule three is that they serve one another even by means of battle.

“It’s easy to serve somebody when it’s [hot] and sunny, but when a thunderstorm rolls through … it becomes a little more difficult,” Kevin mentioned.

“The disagreement can stand by itself … it’s not going to have an effect on our kindness and courtesy towards each other.

“If you get a head massage from somebody that’s pissed off at you, you know you’re loved.”

And the final one shouldn’t be retaining rating.

“[My father] said that a lot of couples, their goal is to each give 50 percent … he said that’s a terrible goal in a marriage. It should be 100 percent each,” the 26-year-old mentioned.


A man and a woman, a couple with a 34-year age gap, standing in a pool with drinks.
Gracen Greagen, 26, and Kevin Greagan, 60, say they pray collectively every day and solely drink alcohol once they’re collectively.
@gracenfaithg/TikTok

“You both give your all, and that’s how you can make it work,” Kevin added.

“The worst thing a person can do is keep a list, or even take notes on their phone of the ways they’ve been slighted — don’t do that. Don’t keep it in your heart or mind, release it.”

In the feedback, individuals took situation with the “strict” guidelines, particularly the one on alcohol.

“If you don’t ‘allow’ one another to consume alcohol without your significant other, this only proves your lack of self-control. Whether the lack of self-control stems from an internal source or external, this only proves irresponsibility,” one mentioned.

Someone else mentioned the principles felt “forced” somewhat than “organic.”

Relationship knowledgeable Beck Thompson instructed information.com.au that she doesn’t see something inherently fallacious with the couple’s guidelines.

“Praying together, not keeping score, showing up with kindness even when you’re in conflict — these are things I encourage in my own clients,” the pinnacle coach on the Relationship Circle mentioned.

“The issue isn’t the rules themselves, it’s the language around them. The moment you call something a ‘non-negotiable rule’ in a relationship, it shifts the tone from connection to compliance. Healthy couples tend to arrive at these things naturally, not announce them like a contract.”

The relationship coach additionally famous the alcohol non-negotiable was barely regarding.

“On the surface, choosing not to drink alone sounds like a boundaries conversation. But when you’re pre-emptively defending it to the internet before anyone’s even asked, that’s worth paying attention to,” she mentioned.

“Defensiveness is usually a signal that, on some level, you already know something looks off.”

There have been additionally many feedback on the video about their age-gap relationship.

“This is how bad I want a lake house,” somebody wrote.

Others implied the lady was a gold digger.

“I also hate working,” one quipped.

“Excited that my wife could be born in three years,” another person teased.

“The internet is going to pile on any age-gap relationship, and a lot of that reaction is kneejerk,” Thompson says.

“A 34-year age gap isn’t automatically a problem. Adults get to choose who they love.”

The couple has additionally clapped again on the critics, saying they’re okay that “not everyone understands” their relationship.

They additionally insist that not one of the guidelines are about “restriction” or “control.”

“People hear rules and they think control, but we hear clarity and alignment,” she mentioned.

“It’s not for everyone, but it works for us. So you do you, and we’ll do us.”


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